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ANGUSPOUNDER

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1 Follower
520 Karma
Joined 1 year ago
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ANGUSPOUNDER 0 points

*runs up to you with huge grin on my face like :D*

*violently slaps you across the face :D*

*turns you around and begins furiously dry humping you :D*

OHHHH FUCK YEAH BABY!!!!

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

is it the python between your legs???

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

damn dude that guy is skinny af

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

*you hear a squeaking noise in the distance*

*you get up to investigate*

*you follow the sound to my office*

*you peer into the doorway and notice me bouncing up and down on a dildo in my computer chair*

*you notice a picture of Rachel Sweet full screen on my monitor*

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point
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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

AGONGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG............................................

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

Bought a bunch of random house stuff I've been putting off. Light bulbs for random light fixtures, tools and supplies that randomly went missing, new shower curtains and stuff.

Mainly stuff that would make my wife happy so I can take her to pound town later.

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

WE'RE GONNA FUCKING LOSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M STILL CHEERING FOR THE UNDERDOGS!!!!!!!!!!!

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ANGUSPOUNDER 2 points

FUCK COMCAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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ANGUSPOUNDER 2 points

no but the hilarious part is I left like 20 minutes later because a thunderstorm was coming in and the way those slow blubbery families came in I know it took them like 30 minutes to then gather all their gear and leave and they definitely got dunked on

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ANGUSPOUNDER 2 points

lets see what u look like!

*punches the wall*

LETS SEE WHAT U LOOK LIKE!!

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

it is now cause you replied when I'm now FUCKING CUMMINNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

UNNNNNHHHHHHHHHHHH YYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UGH!

God dude...

Fuck...

Yes...

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

Did you know if you eat chocolate you have a higher chance of winning a Nobel peace prize?

It's true.

Most Nobel prize winners came from German speaking, chocolate engorging countries.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35Ulwur8brY&ab_channel=JSGordon212

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

It was a joke, you would have recognized that if you had social skills and had watched the video.

But it's something I learned from my statistics professor in college. An example of how statistics can be twisted to fit a narrative. Since Central European chocolate consuming countries also coincidentally produced many Nobel prize winners, you can twist that to influence others.

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

That's not a day of the week, ho.

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

It was a joke, you would have recognized that if you had social skills and had watched the video.

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ANGUSPOUNDER 1 point

It's too new. But I hope it doesn't end up like Reddit.

> I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle.

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